Dave Ramsey is one of the most influential personal finance voices in America. His “Baby Steps” program is simple, straightforward, and powerful—helping millions of people get out of debt, build savings, and regain control over their financial lives. The genius of Ramsey’s system lies in its psychological approach.
He builds confidence and creates momentum by breaking down overwhelming goals into small, achievable steps. There’s real behavioral and financial wisdom baked into his approach.
Frum Life Differs
However, like many popular systems, Ramsey’s 7 Baby Steps approach wasn’t built with frum families in mind. Our lives are structured differently. We get married young, have large families KH, pay steep tuition bills, and shoulder communal obligations that most Americans can’t imagine. What works for the average American household can fall flat, or even cause damage, in the Orthodox world.
In this article, we’ll walk through all seven of Ramsey’s Baby Steps, explain where the logic breaks down, and make the case for a smarter, more realistic roadmap for frum life.
Step 1: Save $1,000 for a Starter Emergency Fund
Starting with a small, reachable goal builds momentum and gives people a taste of stability. But let’s be real—$1,000 doesn’t go far, especially in frum life. That’s a weekly grocery bill or two for a large family.
Also, most frum families already live inside a built-in emergency fund—parents, in-laws, siblings, neighbors, shul rabbis, gemachs, and Tomchei Shabbos often gladly step in when things go south. It’s not ideal to rely on that, but it’s real. So yes, build a cushion, but this is baby to the point of meaningless.
Step 2: Pay Off All Debt (Except the House)
This is Ramsey at his best—shining a spotlight on the destructive trap of credit cards, car loans, and buy-now-pay-later culture. And he’s right; avoiding and getting out of toxic consumer debt is a game changer. But debt is also where his philosophy turns extreme.
Unlike Ramsey’s assertions, not all debt is bad. For frum families facing sky-high housing costs, tuition, and simchas, using debt wisely is often the only way to manage and build anything. Borrowing for a home, education, or business isn’t reckless—it’s reality. Ramsey’s anti-debt absolutism can actually hold people back. Don’t abhor debt— use it with seichel.
Step 3: Save 3–6 Months of Expenses
Building a hefty cushion for unexpected expenses is wise. But for frum families, it’s often impractical early on. Six months of expenses for a large frum family means tens of thousands of dollars- money that may be urgently needed for buying a home or getting a 401k match.
And don’t forget: we already live with a stronger safety net. Family, friends, community funds, and gemachs are often available to assist during emergencies. Self-sufficiency is a great goal, hashkafically and practically. But we WANT people buying houses and opening businesses, and we need to support that.
Step 4: Invest 15% of Income in Retirement
15% for savings is a solid target—but timing is everything. For many frum couples, retirement focus comes way too early. When you’re still renting, still juggling tuition, simchas, and sky-high grocery bills, it rarely makes sense to lock up 15% of your income into retirement accounts you can’t touch for decades.
Yes, retirement matters. But if you overload those accounts too soon, you may face penalties later if you need the money sooner. In frum life, building stability and flexibility in the short and medium-term often takes priority. Retirement should stay on the radar—but not at the expense of your current reality.
Step 5: Save for Kids’ College
This one barely applies. Most frum families simply aren’t dropping $250,000 on an out-of-state Ivy university. And they shouldn’t. Kudos to us, we’ve built smarter, cheaper paths to higher education.
Even in the general world, growing numbers are questioning whether college is worth the exorbitant price tags. Also, grants and aid are widely available, especially for moderate-income families. College saving isn’t the main financial hurdle in frum life—yeshivah tuition and launching growing families are. This step feels both outdated and unapplicable.
Step 6: Pay Off Your House Early
This is a classic Dave Ramsey move—eliminate your biggest bill and enjoy peace of mind. It sounds amazing. And might be a decent goal for some. But for frum families, this advice can easily backfire.
Mortgages are locked in at reasonable-to-low rates, especially when they are tax-deductible, as they are for many frum families. Pouring every spare dollar into early mortgage payoff might feel safe, but it can rob you of liquidity, flexibility, and the ability to invest elsewhere. If all your money is tied up in your house, you may actually end up in a very vulnerable spot.
In a world where simchas, tuition, and large families require serious cash flow, locking it all into bricks isn’t always wise. Stability matters—but so does financial agility.
Step 7: Build Wealth and Give Generously
Now, for this one, we’re fully on board. Building wealth is not just about comfort or luxury. It’s about creating menuchas hanefesh, opportunity, and long-term familial stability. And giving! That’s built into our DNA. Tzedakah, hachnasas orchim, helping family—it’s not a nice-to-have, it’s the way we live.
While Dave frames this as the final step, for frum families, a desire to give should be a starting point. We give even when we’re stretched. The key is building wealth with seichel so that the giving can grow with it. On this, Dave gets it right—and it’s a great note to end on.
We need 7 Big Boy Steps
Dave Ramsey’s system is powerful, but it’s not one-size-fits-all. For frum families, the numbers are bigger, the stakes are higher, and the financial path is steeper. We don’t need baby steps. We need Big Boy Steps—a smarter, stronger system of hishtadlus that can handle real life in our community. Click here to view the Big Boy Steps for frum families.
Want to dig deeper?
Try these related articles
Frum Financial Planning: Why It’s Entirely Different